Rocks in the Dryer

Whoopsie Daisy

I posted yesterday about a funny book-comes-to-life-event here at home.  In an effort to be Little Miss Social Media I decided to post the link to the book's author's facebook page.  It was so 2011 of me and I was very excited. 

The day was going along as normal (normal for a very rainy day in the first week of summer vacation) and the boys and I were at Chuck E Cheese for lunch, it's sad but true.  In came a facebook update from Gretchen Rubin the author of The Happiness Project.  I was so excited that my communication had been read, acknowledged and responded too.  How totally cool is that..... until:

 

Yep, that's right, the excerpt I referenced wasn't from her book!  Oddly, my immediate reaction was to insist that she was wrong.  I know what I remember .... then the actual thinking side of my brain kicked in and calmly alerted me that surely the actual author of said book would really be the one who truly knew.

I plowed through another likely suspect last night until I found it.  The instance I was referencing was from The Blessing of a Skinned Knee by Wendy Mogel.  It too is really a great book and the two of these (amoung a few others) are ones I continue to read and re-read. 

Yesterday's blunder did add a light and laughter to my day, quite a bit of it.  I still can't get over my innate insistence of my rightness, perhaps that is an example of something I need to look at further.  It was also fun to test out the open world of social media.  Making contact with the author of a book that I have read and love so dearly was an absolute thrill.   I think I will try it again, though maybe with a little more attention to the facts, before I hit the publish button.

Happiness Project : Backlash

I have mentioned, ad nauseum, about reading and embracing The Happiness Project.  I have enjoyed putting many recommendations into place and most have had a surprisingly positive effect.  There was one instance in-particular that has seen a lasting effect, though I don't know if the impact is what we could call positive....or is it?

There was a chapter about the author's (Grethen Rubin) struggle to get her child to brush teeth at night without the normal tantrum and adult loosing temper combo.  This is something that erupts here nightly.  My six year old refuses to brush his teeth and it is a struggle that, due to it's longevity, is wearing me down and taking me places I don't like to go.....

Mrs. Rubin tells how she decided to handle the situation with a matter-of-fact quality, no temper, no emotion, just facts.  She calmly said to her daughter (and I am paraphrasing) If you don't care to brush your teeth that is fine.  Humans brush their teeth every night and every morning, other animals do not.  If you do not wish to brush your teeth like the rest of the humans then you may go outside and sleep with the animals.  She took her daughter's hand and calmly walked her to the back door.  After a couple of nights or so of this reminder her daughter took to calm and compliant teeth brushing.

I chose to tell my son about this story I had read in a book.  I told him a mommy wrote it and that it made perfect sense.  "She's right" I told him, "humans brush teeth, animals don't and apparently the rule of thumb is that humans who don't brush are to sleep outside."  He didn't take too kindly to this advice and had some choice words for the author who would suggest such horror upon a child.

The teeth brushing struggles continue here.  Though interestingly this came home from kindergarten for Father's Day.

It's bullet point #2 that is of particular interest:

"He (my father) never would throw me outside if I didn't brush my teeth, like in the book."  Well, at least the little sucker was listening and comprehending, I think I should continue to mention this little factoid each evening and now since 2 fox have taken up residence in our backyard it should be of much more significance.

Reading Much Lately?

One might think I am conducting research.  Maybe I am.  My findings have me all fired up.  I feel empowered, ready for serious action, mad, excited, proud, eager ... all sorts of things. 

** I have intentionally not linked the books to a purchase site -  I do not intend to promote that you purchase them or if you want to, where you should.

 

Here is the short list:  The Price of Privilege

Don't let the name fool you.  Living in this country is privilege, and the wisdom of this book applies to any income bracket.  It's not how much money you have, it's how you spend it or how you "spend" what you have on your kids.  Best said review here

 

Revolution in the Bleachers:  I foresee being at war with Big Daddy on this topic for years to come, I have done my research and am ready for battle.  Many parts of this book made me gasp for breath, cry, cringe, nearly vomit and for the most part, hate the generation of parents I am among.  Great summary here.

Last Child in the Woods Author Richard Louv knew just what I've been preaching and pleading.... Here is the author's overview.

The Happiness Project.  Love it.  Author, Gretchen Rubin has a blog that brings it to life. Learning much, implementing much.  Good darn knowledge.  My own project has begun.

Mind in the Making.  Still working on this one, I keep get interrupted by others....still well worth it, can't wait to make the time to finish.

Game On - I also didn't get to finish this one, yet.  It was due back to library before complete - I plan to check it out again ....  Great praise and quotes here,  Synopsis here.  I need to get my copy back.

 

Many above were suggested reading from The Race to Nowhere site.

Related titles I have loved from previous reading journeys Include:  all by Dr. Michael Thompson, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, by Wendy Mogel, Consuming Kids (and all by Susan Lin) to mention a few.

The connectedness of them is all quite startling.  It's easy for me as much of it confirms my intuition, my gut on how to do this thing called parenting, raising boys, all the rest. Though each time I pick one up and dive back in I get so much.  The problem is I feel I am at battle, waging war with the Joneses you might say.  They, The Joneses, are a plentiful and mighty army and at most times I feel alone with my convictions.  If the Joneses would stop all their foolishness my life sure would be a lot easier.  I also feel at battle with my husband.  Big D has a tendency to worry about those damn Joneses too much in my opinion and is not ready to concede to the conclusiveness of my research.

The Happiness Project encourages me to take more notes, even if I don't know the purpose of said note taking.  I've read so many books and learned so much but it feels like it's all melted into one puddle in my brain.  I can't think of one fact to quote when I need to.  The Happiness Project also encourages me (this is my reading of it) to write a book.  Not so much that I need to publish it, just write it.  I think I agree.  I think I might take notes on my research, organize it, come to fact based conclusions and put it into one nice, easy to read, self published book.

OMG - I can do it and give it to big D for fathers day! When is father's day? How long does it take to receive said self published book once written?  Happiness Project says I should spend no more than 30 days writing my book, done.  I have a project to do (maybe I really can "publish" it here at home since time is of the essence).  Better get on it, people's lives are at stake!

 

Chelsea Handler at Wellesley Books, Tuesday, May 10th

"We are thrilled to bring to Wellesley one of America's most acclaimed and cutting edge comedians. Chelsea Handler will be at Wellesley Books signing her new book, Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me on the release date, Tuesday, May 10th at 5:00 pm. Chelsea is known for a unique comedic style that combines fearless honesty, ironic riffs and self-deprecations - with no shortage of material. She will be joined by Josh Wolf, a weekly guest comedian on Chelsea Lately and author of one of the chapters in Chelsea's new book".

via www.wellesley.indiebound.com

I was so excited to hear my BFF Chelsea Handler is going to be in quaint little Wellesley tonight (I seriously didn't think Wellesley was a Chelsea kind of town).  I was swiftly making plans to dash to Wellesley Books, get my copy and sit and chat with Chelsea. 

Then I remembered, I loathe public events like this.  I am rather sure I'd get no quality time with Chelsea, I'd stand in line with the rest of the losers with a big cheezy grin on our faces.  Chelsea or not, I am not that kinda girl.  Would buying a copy of the book, standing in line and having Chelsea sign her name in it impact my life?  I don't think so.  Would inviting Chelsea over to my house and sitting on the porch laughing our guts out while drinking stiff cocktails impact my life? Yes.

IF Chelsea were interested, and chances are she's not, only since she's on a book tour . . . I think I'll sit on the porch by myself tonight and watch the boys sling mud at each other then watch a little Chelsea Lately on DVR.  I am sorry to miss her, I know we'd love each other.  I think I'll wait and catch her on stage somewhere (and subsequently back stage).  If anyone goes, tell her I said "hi".

Gift Giving, RDF Style

Yes, you all know that I take things from the Take It or Leave It at the RDF (recycling and disposal facility, ie: town dump), I shop at Salvation Army and thrift stores.  My favorite place on Earth is the Brimfield Antique Fair (coming soon mark your calendars!). Most of what I dive in dumpsters for is for myself.  However, from time to time I do find gifts.  Some of the best gifts I have given have been found items.  Sometimes the recipient knows the source, sometimes I embellish ("I got it at an Antique Store" sounds so much more palatable), most often I say nothing.

My brother and sister in law just remodeled and moved into an extraordinary home on Boston's Beacon Hill.  It is exquisite to say the least.  It's a place worthy of movie sets and big shiny design magazine photo shoots.  Where did I get their housewarming gift?  That's right, the dump. I gave it with pride and I will have you know it is prominently displayed in their fine home.  We had the pleasure of celebrating Easter dinner at their pad and lookie what I say standing erect on the custom built in bookcase that is fabulous enough to lick...

Second shelf from top, first item from left:  A vintage, first edition, hardcover copy of "Joy Street" written by Francis Parkinson Keyes.

The significance you ask?  Well, their home is on actual Joy Street, the Joy Street the book is written about and not only that but their building is in the illustration.

Could it get better?  Why yes it does.  In the jacket flap was a description of the story, and I am paraphrasing, it's about the Boston blue bloods who live on Beacon Hill and all of the scandal that ensues when the Italians move in.  Do you know my surname and that of my brother and sister in law?  It doesn't get any more Italian than that.  Joy indeed! I am beyond thrilled their hearts and minds were open enough to receive the gift no matter it's source! 

I will say it again, the best things in life ARE FREE!

 

 

Depression be Damned

photo credit: wiserdating.com

I have a few too many friends who battle depression.  Some seek help professionally others don't. To them I offer my friendship, love and council as best I can.  I believe in depression, I believe in it's power and clinical nature.  I don't believe it's a choice.  However, I believe there are many disconnected factors that feed it. 

My eyes could bleed right now from all of the books I have been reading on related and not so related topics, yet they all seem to melt together into a common puddle.  Our culture with all of it's greatness can play tricks on those of us living in it.  I am coming to realize that so much of what we "have" is so much at the root of personal struggle.  I could go on and on the topic and probably will in the weeks to come.  For now I want to do another exercise.

I don't suffer from depression. I am also fully aware that many people are hard-wired for depression and posses an innate negative view of life.  I have been blessed with the opposite state of mind.   I can't begin to understand why I am lucky enough to be wired this way, but I know its benefit.  I see its power, strength and health.  It fuels happiness, contentment and peace.

Last night I read a book to my boys that we checked out of the library.  After a day of counseling a friend who is in the midst of a dark struggle, it struck a cord.  It shed light for me and I want to share it with her and others.  I do not intend to negate the seriousness of a clinical condition but rather to impress similar words I actually spoke to her yesterday:  Our brains are not powerful enough to think of more than one thing at a time, make yourself think of something else, do something else.  Be powerful, take action and fight it.  You have so much for which to be grateful. Can we be stronger than that which aflicts us?

The book is called "The Secret of Saying Thanks" I don't think it's any great book, the boys thought it was weird, but the last pages made the point.

 

The heart that gives thanks is a happy one, for we cannot feel thankful and unhappy at the same time. 

The more we say thanks, the more we find to be thankful for. 

And the more we find to be thankful for, the happier we become.

We don't give thanks because we're happy.

We are happy because we give thanks.

 Let's all make a list, shall we?  Let's add to it daily.  Something everyday that is worthy of thanks and find the peace that comes with it.

Today my list includes:

I am thankful a robin has nested in the honeysuckle bush outside my kitchen window

I am thankful for Pandora

I am thankful that our town kindergarten started four full days this week.

I am thankful that I have a steady stream of electricity fueling my home.

all, all that feels good.

 

Halloween Preparedness :: Haunt them all with an e-card

My friends at Barefoot Books have a spooky new book out this year.  Perfectly timed for Halloween.  My boys are LOVING listening to the stories read on CD (they are really not all that spooky).  It's been a wonderful way to ring in the season. 

In celebration.  Barefoot is offering a fun e-card you can send to those you wish to trick this year . . and check out the book, Tales of Mystery & Magic while you are there, you can "Step Inside" (click the button), see the spread and hear some of the track ... whoooooooooooo!

 

Confessions of a Prairie Bitch :: The Memoir of Nellie Oleson

Confessions of a Prairie Bitch:  How I survived Nellie Oleson and learned to love being hated.

By Alison Arngrim

Just finished reading this book.  Pretty sure it the most favorite thing I have read in a VERY long time.  Could be that I am about as sick of the same ole dress it up in new clothes, fiction story line as a human could be.  Or, it could be that there is just an inordinate amount of Little House on the Prairie theme circling my life right now.  Whatever the case - I was drawn to it in the bookstore, I do like staying on theme.

I don't often recommend books, I think the reasons why any of us like a book is so very personal. But this book?  This one I know you'll love!

This book is an fabulous journey.  So real and original and of such familiarity, let's face it, we kind of feel like we know the characters don't we?  Hearing about the life of the girl who played  Nellie Oleson was so eye opening, entertaining.  Not only is the book a fun peek to what life on the set and cast of a wildly popular show is, but it is an intimate portrayal of what it is to play (be) a character that people around the globe unanimously despise.  Alison Arngrim is my kind of girl.  She heals herself through humor.  She sees the positive in any situation, she learns and takes from her experiences and above all, she can laugh the loudest at herself.

I loved it, devoured it, didn't want it to end.  I am sad its over.  This was one of those books where I started rationing my reading as approached the end:  "Ok, only 10 pages a night from here on out ..."

You can get a copy from Indie Bound here

Read Alison Arngrim's Blog here

I'd loan you my copy, but it already has a waiting list.

Happy reading!

Hanging with My Best Friend Jane

Just when I said I wouldn't be posting this week . . . look at me go.   I got to take part of something rather magical last night and I can't control myself.   I attended "An Evening with Jane Goodall" at Harvard University's Saunders Theater.  Lucky duck.

First of all if you have yet to attend an event at Saunders Theater (pronounced by Bostonians as "Saahn-ders"  not "Sand-ers" as you may want to say) you may want to add it to your list.  It is a magnificent place.  Clearly I was not lucky wicked smaaht enough to actually attend Harvard, but let it be known I will jump at any opportunity to attend an event there.  I have enjoyed many a marvelous shows inside its walls and last night did not fall short.

I was invited to attend the event through my work with Barefoot Books. Barefoot is supporter of Jane Goodall's organization Roots and Shoots (YEAH Barefoot!) and I, the lucky recipient of one of Barefoot's tickets. 

How wonderful to get the tiniest glimpse inside the work of this extraordinary woman.  It was hard, at least for me, to keep my mind clear, to just listen.  My inner dialog was reaching it's own tipping point; "have to do more, I want to be her, I want to hang out with her, work for her, If only I didn't have children..., why is my life so lame, can't believe I spent the whole day at IKEA, I hate myself, I am the source of global warming, I want to go study the chimpanzee's in Gombe, I like chimpanzee's as much as Jane, I even had a chimpanzee birthday party when I turned 7, She's so lucky, it's too late now, too many people want to study chimpanzee's .... bliddy bloddy on and on. 

Then Jane started talking about how the little things each of us do make a difference.  "Coffee" she said, you can make a difference with the coffee you drink.  Then I remembered.

There was a great article in Hiefer International's publication World Ark (I think I wanted to blog about it and never did) about the work Green Mountain Coffee Roasters is doing with Heifer and elsewhere (I know now directly with the Jane Goodall Institute) Promoting natural, organic coffee growing, ie: shade grown.  Teach, help, aid farmers to grow coffee in shade, to grow trees too.  Trees are good for coffee farming and you go ahead and guess the by product.  Habitat for chimps and and all of their forest friends.

I have a Keurig single serve coffee maker.  Keurig is a wholly owned subsidiary of Green Mountain Coffee Roasters, Green Mountain Coffee Roasters owns the patent on the "k cups", single serve coffee pod things.  I own the machine, I buy the coffee....Ahhhhhhhhhh, my work is done.

There were so many great little factoids {Did you know that a human can receive a blood transfusion from a chimp?  Our blood is that similar}, so much inspiration, humor, insight and of course; call to action.  There were so many books by and about Jane for sale and I wanted them ALL.  Problem was everyone there wanted them too and I couldn't commit to the line.  I plan to read her biography, grab a couple of the children's books and was rather intrigued by her stage companion, Prof. Richard Wrangham's new book:  Catching Fire: How cooking made us human. 

And to think I thought my week was already over-committed now I have 1000's of pages to read and 300,000 chimpanzees to save...

Today's Giveaway: Barefoot Books

This is a great one friends!  A collection of "healthy living" titles for kids from Barefoot Books! 

Kids Kitchen (yummy recipes kids can actually make), Yoga Pretzels (a card deck full of yoga poses - it's a total family favorite at our house), My Daddy is a Pretzel (super cute story book that works yoga poses into the story)

 
All three are yours for the winning!  Simply leave a comment on this post for your chance to win.  Commenting closes Sunday 1/24/2010.  One winner will be randomly drawn (US shipping only pa-lease!).  Good Luck . . . and if you don't win?  These three titles are on sale at the Barefoot Books Website til the end of the month.

Happy Healthy New Year!

United Through Reading

Is a picture worth a thousand words?  This one is.  Behold our family's Christmas giving project.  I can't take too much credit for it, the opportunity landed in my in-box.

You need not come in too close contact with me to know how passionate I am about Barefoot Books.  Being involved with this little, yet amazing company has brought much to my life and that of my family.

After the hectic holiday selling season came to an end, I was left with a hefty load of inventory.  I planned to host a series of "sale" open houses where I would sell off the remainder in an effort to not have to lug it to my basement and wait for next year.  The first day of the planned open house the New England skies opened to a blizzard.  There went that idea.

As I watched the snow fall, I was greeted with an email asking for advice on where to get books donated for the United Through Reading program for soldiers in Iraq. 

The request was for 100 children's books.  Soldiers in active duty would receive the books, be video taped reading them, then the books and video will be sent home to their children.  This specific platoon is stationed too far from a USO to participate in the larger, supported program.  They wanted to pull it off themselves, independently.

It took one quick glance at my kitchen table piled high with books to make the decision.  Where do I ship them?

My 5 year old and I packed up the books and carted them to the post office (with a few short intermissions to read titles he had long forgotten).

Email correspondence with the Platoon's commander has been unbelievable.  His professionalism and gratitude is nothing short of overwhelming.  Sharing the magic of reading is so much of my life's passion and this project has been such a gift to me in realizing, yet again, all I am able to take for granted.

I have always felt that there is such magic in reading and this little blip in our life does nothing short of proving it.  Happy reading one and all.

Snow Day Activity

It's rather simple really . . . buy books on sale from my favorite little affiliate, it's all I am doing today!

People Magazine Bookclub: Emergency Meeting

As you may know I am in a book club, of the People Magazine variety.  There was not a club meeting planned for December - too much falalala-ing - HOWEVER - with the breaking news and excitement associated with Tiger Woods - we decided we had to have an emergency meeting.  This is just too important.

The Menu:  Swedish Meatballs (for her),  Pigs in a blanket (for him), Vodka Cranberries (for me, unfortunately one too many - but I digress)

There was much heated discussion that lead to a unanimous consensus: 

Yes, we too would beat our husbands with golf clubs if they committed the same, numerous infractions.

Thanks for the laughs ladies - now back to the business of holiday preparedness . . .

Rocks in the Dryer Picks: Best "Toys" for the Holidays

If I have said it once, I have said it a million times:  My boys don't like toys. At least it has never been the case that manufactured toys are their playthings of choice.  My boys like real things,  my things, my husbands things, things not meant for kids.

Did I create this in them, possibly, I myself think most toys are rather lame.

Here is a quick list of some of the things I have chosen for their gifts in the past that they loved:

They really love office supplies.  I often spend a bit of time in the office supply store and find things they would like.  Clips, boxes, stickers, labels, but the one stand out is Receipt Pads with carbon/duplicate.  We call it magic paper, these my friends, are a HUGE hit. 

My older son simply loves filling out forms and tickets.  He loves checking the boxes, fake writing, tallying, calculating.  It never ceases to amaze me how entertaining this is for him.  I also give them old check books, deposit slips, order forms.  Pack it all up in a bin or a box with real ballpoint pens and that there is a gift!

Real Calculator (not a dorky made for kid one) or better yet adding machine that has a paper roll - they love making tickets.  Again, hours I tell you, hours of work and pleasure.

The Out of Reach Grabber Tool.  While this belongs to them I use it often (this past weekend hanging outdoor Christmas lights for one).  They get the biggest kick out of my needing to borrow one of their tools.  It is a long standing favorite, we have been through many.

Spray Bottles.  We are huge spray bottle fans.  There is lots of work to be done that often requires a spray bottle.  The boys do lots of outdoor painting with their spray bottles, in that when they spray something it temporarily changes color . . . we have miles of fence that needs painting regularly. The bigger, the sturdier the better,  just add water.

Shovels made for kids are so bad, so poorly constructed that if they do actually attempt to shovel, well you know what happens.  I found these a few years ago, they have been worked hard and are still going.  We take them to the beach, shovel snow, dirt and anything else we can find.  They are still going strong.  Look for Collapsible Snow Shovel, it's meant to go in the car for emergencies, it's quite sturdy and great size for kids.

A good bucket is hard to find.  Again when you buy a bucket that is intended for kids it will last about 2 uses depending on the job at hand.  I try to find sturdy worker guy buckets that are intended for real work.  We have added a pulley system to their tree fort, attached at the end is a strong bucket, this little set up has been a hit for years and had a total cost of about $12.

 

There is so much you can find at the hardware store:  Caution tape, tools, clamps, tape measures, keys and locks, flash lights (always the real kind), nuts & bolts, rope, tape, pulleys . . . . the list goes on.  Just see it through new eyes.  I once bought long tubes of foam pipe insulation ($1.29 each) and should have won a mother of the year award.  They were swords, they were flags, hurdles, megaphone - they used it for so much, for so long until the foam finally disintegrated.

Legos.  I prefer to buy lego lots on Ebay.  I am not a huge fan of the licensed and packaged sets.  Where is the creativity in that?  Give me the freedom!  Granted we normally build it once and there is skill in that - then take it apart and build what we want.  You pay so much money for that package and the Star Wars or Indiana Jones license.  Why not go for these big ole bags of good old fashioned legos.

Books.  You knew I was going to say that.  Books Books Books.  You have to give them books, good books.  Aside from much of the above mentioned, books will most likely be the only thing you give them that will still be in use in February.

You choose, you can chase Zhu Zhus, Bakugan and whatever else the advertisers and marketers tell you kids want OR take nice leisurely stroll to the local hardware store and exercise your own creativity. 

I promise I promise I promise - it's much more fun (and you won't be un-wrangling all of that toy packaging on Christmas morn!)  Fa la la la la.

Thankful for . . . . Big Fat Discounts!

Stay away from the mall . . .  I repeat . . . . stay away from the mall!  Need to shop this weekend just do yourself a favor and do it online.  Here's one spot with a "Festive" discount.  Barefoot Books 20% off and free shipping for orders over $35   - go ahead and get those teacher gifts at very least.

 

Don't forget to enter special offer code word "FESTIVE" at check out!  Happy clicking.