Went to see Madam Surgeon about the searing, stinging, electric, paralyzing pain in the ole abdomen. Her diagnosis was not at all what I expected. Her suspicion is that the two back injuries I have suffered over the last two years are the result of a disc problem in my lower back, not muscle spasms as previously diagnosed and treated.
Who knew, the nerves attached to lower spinal discs wrap around the side of your body and are firmly anchored in the lower abdomen. I was most displeased. I was certain that a little surgery to fix said abdomen would result in a little tummy tuck, gift with purchase. How wrong I was.
The only gift I am getting is a MRI and what would my inaugural 40th year be without my very first MRI? Back surgery is not at all on my to do list, and by no means do I assume it will be necessary. I speculate to be treated though physical therapy and other external means, though what in the world do I know anyway.
Sweet lover, boyfriend, trainer Jay told me I should stop lifting cars to impress my friends with my freakish human strength, according to him this is the clearly root of my ailment. He also said, "quit your whining and get on the treadmill". Jerk.
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